RE: The revolution not being televised

Maybe not, but it will be all over the damn internet, which is going to be about the same soon.

And I have the internet now. All of it, stockpiled here in my apartment like a cache of ex-soviet weaponry.

I'm sorry if you were expecting my Disney drinking buddies article, but I've had to postpone that for a while on account of not having written it yet. But "sorry" is the wrong word; what I was going for was really "unmoved in every way". Sort of like Mary Poppins but with apathy.

Now I, like so many others, can instantly flop out my god-awful opinions about wardrobe malfunctions, president malfunctions, and the ongoing corndog/zombie crisis.

Life is, as they say, a bowl of cherries. A bowl of cherries called "the internet", which as I have said, I am now storing in my house in big crates.